sadfreezingbrit_archive: (what happens when you realise)
sadfreezingbrit_archive ([personal profile] sadfreezingbrit_archive) wrote2011-07-23 08:37 pm

one attempt at one-eyed brunch [21/??? artefacts collected]

[ It's been almost a week since ex-mafia!Philip had a very unfortunate event run-in with still-mafia!Dean. The result? His previous Wonderland lives are still intact, but he's down one eye and his arm isn't doing so well either. And that's the understatement of the day.

So. It's been almost a week. Hardly enough time to heal all wounds (or any of them for that matter), but time enough for Philip to get over the worst and out of his room. Or try to, in any case.

Right now (now being 11 in the morning) he's standing in the kitchen, arduously slaving over his attempt at late breakfast. The injury to his right shoulder is difficult to hide, what with his arm in a sling. But at least his left eye (or lack thereof) is cleverly concealed behind a pair of sunglasses.

To reiterate: Kitchen. Breakfast. 11 o'clock. Right arm in sling. Ridiculous Fashionable sunglasses. Shattered glass.

...Shattered glass?
]

Jesus, not again.

[ Stepping aside Philip looks at the mess. After six days improvements are coming along at last, but missteps (or misgrabs, as it were) still happen all too often. Oh depth perception, he never knew how much he loved you until you were gone.

And yet the milk keeps dripping on the floor; cold, cruel and undeterred by his struggles and frustrations.

To continue: Paper towels. Broom. Scoop. New try. Deep sigh.
]

[identity profile] sadfreezingbrit.livejournal.com 2011-07-26 09:13 pm (UTC)(link)
...If you're about to tell me that I should preserve the eggy flavour I'm going to have to ask you to leave.

[ EGGS. ARE. SERIOUS. BUSINESS. And Philip will not have this debate again. ]

[identity profile] itsahotone.livejournal.com 2011-07-26 09:23 pm (UTC)(link)
[Staaaare.]

Uh, okay. Don't have a British hissy fit or anything; I was just saying. I've never seen anyone add that much to eggs before.

[Why no, she's not snickering at all. How dare you.]

[identity profile] sadfreezingbrit.livejournal.com 2011-07-26 09:52 pm (UTC)(link)
[ If his eyes weren't obscured then his look would feel so sorry for Santana right now. ]

Peppers. And onions. That's two extra ingredients. Two. No mushrooms, sausages, bacon, cheese, tomatoes...

[ He'll just keep cooking while rattling off a large and partially horrifying list of things that can allegedly be added to scrambled eggs. Short of pot roast Santana wasn't even too far off. ]

[identity profile] itsahotone.livejournal.com 2011-07-26 10:04 pm (UTC)(link)
You can stop with the list I don't care about, you know. As long as you didn't add poison, I'm good.

[Maybe. It may taste awful, and then she will have to throw them in his face. (Possibly not literally, at least?)]

[identity profile] sadfreezingbrit.livejournal.com 2011-07-26 10:10 pm (UTC)(link)
[ Ignoring so hard. ]

...and of course spam, spam, spam and spam.

{Don't forget about the spam now. }

[ Almost done now. ]

Could you hand me another plate, please?

[identity profile] itsahotone.livejournal.com 2011-07-26 10:23 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh, were you talking to me?

[Grumble grumble here's your damn plate grumble.]

[identity profile] sadfreezingbrit.livejournal.com 2011-07-26 10:42 pm (UTC)(link)
Thank you. [ ]

[ Voila~! He scoops up two small serving of the scrambled pepper eggs and slides one plate over to Santana.

Fishing for a fork he carefully makes his way over to the table and sits down.
]

...Are you going to risk it or do you want me to try first and see if I have a seizure?

[ There's still a hint of bitterness in the question, but it's clearly overshadowed by spam, spam, spaaaaaaam, LOVELY SPAAAAAAM good humour.

Cooking is SO MUCH FUN, it even lifts the mood above where Santana's teasing can reach. At least temporarily.

...And managing his first one-armed, one-eyed breakfast might have something to do with it as well.
]

[identity profile] itsahotone.livejournal.com 2011-07-26 10:52 pm (UTC)(link)
[Good humor? Philip? Oh my god he's high on candy again!!]

It's only super polite to let you try it first. [She's not all that worried, really, but hey. She lives to make lives difficult.

Plus, she is enjoying the rest of her coffee.]

[identity profile] sadfreezingbrit.livejournal.com 2011-07-26 11:03 pm (UTC)(link)
[ Philip shrugs and digs in, having to take the occasional pause to stop his sunglasses from sliding off. He's going to have to ask the closet for a smaller model when he's done here.

Hm. Well. He'd try to make polite conversation, but to be honest he's a little out of ideas on what to ask a teenager, let alone Santana without getting one of her... er, well, let's call them trademark responses.

So he will just sit here and enjoy his poison-free food, every once in a while glancing to check if Santana's given the dish a try yet.
]

[identity profile] itsahotone.livejournal.com 2011-07-26 11:35 pm (UTC)(link)
[She has indeed done so! And she seems to not hate it, since she's still eating. Of course, she is eating at a ridiculously slow pace, and staring at Philip in a way that is possibly unnerving, but hey, eating is eating.]

[identity profile] itsahotone.livejournal.com 2011-07-26 11:56 pm (UTC)(link)
Well what? It's pretty good, I guess. Especially the bell peppers, Dean. What, is my consumption of them not enough?

I'm not going to offer to blow you in thanks or something. [Nom nom. See? More eating.]

1/3

[identity profile] sadfreezingbrit.livejournal.com 2011-07-27 12:26 am (UTC)(link)
[ Oh. Good. If it's pretty good then that's g-JKNSO@"ยง?KK!!

...Well.

Thanks to that other comment he is now choking on his food.

The narration hopes you are happy, Santana.

He just wanted to make sure you liked your breakfast.

But now you probably killed him.

Good job.

Nice work.

Really.
]

2/3

[identity profile] sadfreezingbrit.livejournal.com 2011-07-27 12:27 am (UTC)(link)
[ Oh wait.

He is coughing now.

Well.

That's marginally better.

Give him just a moment.

To compose himself.

Aaaaand....
]

3/3

[identity profile] sadfreezingbrit.livejournal.com 2011-07-27 12:28 am (UTC)(link)
[ ...Reproachful look is go!

Philip will quickly mumble that-
]

I was just asking...

[ -before moving on to sip coffee. ]

[identity profile] itsahotone.livejournal.com 2011-07-27 12:35 am (UTC)(link)
[CACKLE SNICKER GIGGLE CHORTLE ETC]

And this is why I still talk to you.

[identity profile] sadfreezingbrit.livejournal.com 2011-07-28 11:34 pm (UTC)(link)
[ You know, all things considered that is really neither a compliment nor an honour. Philip's less than enthused tch sound into his empty mug might give that sentiment away. ]

Right.

[ He stands up and puts the dishes away to wherever it is Wonderland cleaning works its magic. ]

Anyway. See you around I suppose.

[identity profile] itsahotone.livejournal.com 2011-07-28 11:51 pm (UTC)(link)
Aww, you don't want to stay and gossip?

[identity profile] sadfreezingbrit.livejournal.com 2011-07-28 11:59 pm (UTC)(link)
[ Funny how that decisive NO sounds a lot more like ]

About who?

[ when spoken out loud. ]

[identity profile] itsahotone.livejournal.com 2011-07-29 12:13 am (UTC)(link)
[Well now. Way to suddenly sound like a high school girl wanting to gossip, Philip. And here she was just kidding.]

Is there someone around here worth gossiping about? I mean, you seem a little interested now.

[identity profile] sadfreezingbrit.livejournal.com 2011-07-29 12:23 am (UTC)(link)
I just assumed you had somebody in mind, if you weren't joking.

[identity profile] itsahotone.livejournal.com 2011-07-29 12:27 am (UTC)(link)
I was just going to make hilarious comments about you some more. [She shrugs. You so love her.]

[identity profile] sadfreezingbrit.livejournal.com 2011-07-30 08:09 pm (UTC)(link)
[ Sigh. ]

All right. Then I'll leave you to that and you can tell me how it went next time.

[ Surprisingly the amount of increasingly sharp pain in his head and shoulder is not directly proportional to the amount of patience he can spare for people. ]

[identity profile] itsahotone.livejournal.com 2011-07-31 07:49 pm (UTC)(link)
Aww. I'll miss you! [She cheerfully waves and goes back to her eggs. See, that's a compliment at least, right? She isn't insulting his cooking!]